St. Joe's Consecration Day 14 - The Vice of Sloth and the Virtue of Zeal

 

In the spiritual life, "acedia" (from the Greek for "lack of care") makes us indifferent, discouraged, and apathetic to the will of God. 

Joseph's life didn't go as planned . . . In the instant of hearing the (Good) news from Mary, his life became anything but simple. . . He was faced with knowing that he would be responsible to protect and raise the Son of God! In that instant, Joseph's plans went up in smoke.

We could give Joseph the benefit of a little moment of hesitancy--wondering if he were up to such a task. If Joseph were prone to acedia, this news could have sent Joseph down a path of life that was too much to bear, a life of discouragement, a life ultimately indifferent to the things of God, a life fleeing from union with God. Throughout scripture, however, we see Joseph's life as a life of action. 

. . . (His was) a heroic love of a man, husband, and father that led him to embrace a willingness to risk his life to protect (Mary and Jesus). 

From Consecration to Jesus through Saint Joseph:

An Integrated Look at the Holy Family

(pp. 49-50)

Bottaro and Settle

St. Joseph, Terror of Demons

Have you become discouraged with your life, your relationships, or your vocation when things don't go the way you planned? 

Yes:

• Leaving medical school
• Taking longer than I expected to realize my vocation 
• The rocky start to my career

How can you open yourself to the Lord's encouraging will for you?

Remembering first and foremost how much He loves me. If I trust that the Lord's plans are by definition better for me than my own, I can be open to the Lord's will and free to take action to follow where He leads. 

How can even the "action" of a life of prayer help you to overcome apathy in your life?

Prayer is real work. It takes effort, planning, commitment. Prayer is not passive, even mental prayer. But prayer takes on a more active vibe when I do it communally: at Mass, at meals with friends, in small faith-sharing groups. But I need not wait for these social opportunities to be active in my prayer life. Every moment, I have a choice. 

When fatigue and the "noonday devil" hit me, what do I choose to do? Do I seek solace in some temporary distraction or mindless entertainment? Or do I choose to pray? Do I choose to let God be my strength? Do I reach out to Him and rest in Him and seek His counsel when my energy wanes? This will be the difference between my ability to live a life of action and zeal--or succumbing to sloth. 

St. Joe's Consecration Day 13 - Vice of Gluttony and Virtue of Temperance

 (Adam and Eve) grasped for more than what they needed, and as a result, perfect love expired from their hearts. . . Gluttony is a disordered desire, which abuses the legitimate pleasure God has attached to it.  It weakens the will. It fosters laziness and impurity. 

(By contrast, Mary) trusted the Lord would provide all that she needed, and that providence came through St. Joseph. 

St. Joseph was a stabilizing force in the life of Our Lady and Jesus. He was their protector and guard, but he was also a source of great love. His chaste love for Our Lady was given in temperance. Temperance . . . "ensures the will's mastery over instincts and keeps desires within the limits of what is honorable" (CCC 1809).

From Consecration to Jesus through Saint Joseph:

An Integrated Look at the Holy Family

(pp. 47-48)

Bottaro and Settle

Do you find yourself unsatisfied with the things you have been given?

Yes. Sometimes I wish I had a nicer car or lived in a nicer apartment. Sometimes I long for deeper friendships and romantic relationships. Or I read about new models of phones or laptops because I find the electronics I have now deficient or are just bored by them.  

Do you find yourself longing for more of something good? 

I know I have good, increasingly healthy friendships. But sometimes I want more to the point that I can neglect basic aspects of my life that require regular maintenance. 

Are you tempted to grasp for more than what you have?

Yes. A part of me still wants to be seen recognized for being special in some way. So I look to gadgets or clothes or other things to imbue that kind of distinction onto me. 

How can St. Joseph's model of temperance (attraction to a good but within the limits of what is honorable) be a witness of healthy balance in your life?

He chose the better and ultimately more powerful path because he placed the good before him below the ultimate good (God). St. Joseph trusted and believed in God's plan for him. In doing so, he saw the world for what it is and recognized the beauty and greater good of God's promise and love.  

St. Joe's Consecration Day 12: Vice of Lust and Virtue of Self-Mastery

 Romans 8:12-17

Brothers and sisters, we are not debtors to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. For if you live according to the flesh, you will die, but if by the spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live

    For those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you received a spirit of adoption, through which we cry "Abba, Father!" The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs, heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ, if only we suffer with him so that we may also be glorified with him. 

----

The deep spiritual closeness arising from marital union and the interpersonal contact between man and woman have their definitive origin in the Spirit, the Giver of Life. Joseph, in obedience to the Spirit, found in the Spirit the source of love, the conjugal love which he experienced as a man. And this love proved to be greater than this "just man" could ever have expected within the limits of his human heart. 

-Pope St. John Paul II

Redemptoris Custos,

Were (the artists who depicted St. Joseph as a very old man) what Pope St. John Paul II called "masters of suspicion" in his Theology of the Body (people whose hearts cannot see purity and projects impurity onto others)?

. . . St. Joseph was a man who possessed natural desires toward what is true, good, and beautiful . . . Day in and day out, Joseph was surrounded by perfect femininity. But more than that, he loved and was loved by perfect femininity! As a true man, St. Joseph lived (maybe more than any other man) perfect self-mastery. Daily, he ordered his passions, his attractions toward Our Lady toward love. 

. . . Self-mastery needs attraction and passion to order. The real St. Joseph had these qualities, and he had them for Our Lady, as her husband, as a man would. It was in this experience of authentic masculinity that the true power of his self-mastery was opened to the world. 

From Consecration to Jesus through Saint Joseph:

An Integrated Look at the Holy Family

(pp. 45-46)

Bottaro and Settle

CCC 1804: The virtuous man is he who freely practices the good. 

How freely do you practice the good of self-mastery?

In as much as I reject the pull of my own will for passing things of this world, I know I can practice self-mastery. 

What keeps you from freely living a life of virtue? 

There are many distracting consumerist messages around me embedded in addictive social media platforms and psychologically manipulative app algorithms that lead me out of self-mastery. 

On a deeper level, I still carry the mom- and dad-wounds from my childhood that block me from true healing. Healing comes with it a sense of equanimity, that others' words or behaviors won't compel me to hide myself from God and other people or forget the Way to life and union with God that my spiritual guides and the Church have taught me. 

What are areas of your life that are in need of ordering?

• Vocational discernment
• The steadfast toil of work
• My impenetrable identity as a child of God the Father

How has your understanding of the lived experience of St. Joseph, man and husband, changed?

I have greater awe for the great example of self-mastery and love that St. Joseph showed to his spouse Jesus. I admire the fidelity with which he lived in taking on the responsibilities entrusted to him by God the Father. I take joy in the special closeness he found living so close to the Holy Spirit, Who was and is united to Mary.     

St. Joe's Consecration Day 11: Vice of Anger and Virtue of Kindness

Hebrews 5:1-3

Every high priest is taken from among men and made their representative before God, to offer gifts and sacrifices for sin. He is able to deal patiently with the ignorant and erring, for he himself is beset by weakness and so, for this reason, must make sin offerings for himself as well as for the people.

Joel 2:13

For gracious and merciful is He, slow to anger, rich in kindness, and relenting in punishment. 

 "In the old days, people demanded 'an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth,' and to repay evil for evil. Patience was not yet on the earth, because faith was not on the earth either. Of course, impatience made full use of the opportunities the Law gave it. That was easy when the Lord and Master of patience was not here. But now that he has come and put the grace of faith together with patience, we are no longer allowed to attack someone even with a word—not even to call someone a fool without facing the danger of judgment. The Law found more than it lost when Christ said, 'Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven' (Matthew 5:44-45). This most important commandment summarizes in a word the universal discipline of patience, since it does not allow us to do evil even to people who deserve it."

— Tertullian 

A Year with the Church Fathers: Patristic Wisdom for Daily Living 

(p. 104)

The heart of St. Joseph was molded in these virtues (see Joel 2:13). The way he loved Jesus and Our Lady was from his kind and loving heart. . . As Our Lady was about to deliver Jesus, the kind heart of Jesus desired to protect Our Lady and the Son of God. His kindness to Our Lady provided her a place to rest and deliver Jesus. 

. . . What was the response of Herod's heart when he learned of the Savior's birth? "When Herod realized that he had been deceived by the magi, he became furious. He ordered the massacre of all the boys in Bethlehem and its vicinity two years old and under, in accordance with the time he had ascertained from the magi. (Mathew 2:16). His response was anger, which led to death. The kindness of St. Joseph led to life!

Do you struggle with responding to frustrations or the unexpected with anger?

Yes, there are times when my initial response to frustrations or the unexpected is to want to blame or disparage someone as the cause for whatever challenge I'm experiencing. I can dwell on their deficiencies or character defects. Or I'll respond to minor frustrations by cursing under my breath. 

How do you show kindness to those around you? In your family? Among your friends? 

I show kindness by giving people the benefit of the doubt. When my first response might be to express anger or frustration, I try to pause and think about the extenuating circumstances and struggles that other people are experiencing. I try to reframe their words or behavior in a better light and respond to them in that better light. I try to assume good intent, even finding the words for that intent when other people aren't able to articulate that themselves. 

Over time I've gotten better at this habitual response, especially with my mom and dad, my sister and my brother. With my friends, I let go of my disappointment and pride and continue reaching out to them even if I sometimes feel unheard or unappreciated. I speak to them with good will and hope and cheerfulness, even when I don't initially feel like adopting such an attitude. 

Do you struggle with receiving the kindness of others? 

No. I think I receive kindness well. I can do better by saying a simple "Thank You," instead of explaining away or qualifying compliments. 

Do you show mercy and kindness to those who have wounded you? Or does your heart still harbor anger? 

Yes, I try very hard to. Sometimes those feelings of anger and resentment from woundedness bubble up, either in response to specific incidents or seemingly at random. I can't control these thoughts appearing. But I can do my best to recognize them for what they are -- the devil's tools for division, self-pity, and unforgiveness. 

Where anger still resides in your heart, let us open that place to the kindness of the Father and ask St. Joseph's intercession for our healing.  

St. Joe's Consecration Day 10: The Vice of Envy and the Virtue of Love

 1 Peter 2:1-3

Rid yourself of all malice and all deceit, insincerity, envy, and all slander; like newborn infants, long for pure spiritual milk so that through it you may grow into salvation, for you have tasted that the Lord is good.

Love finds joy when another is successful. To love another is to be willing to suffer for them. When someone we love is given gifts or graces, we celebrate with them. 

. . . (Jesus and Mary) possessed gifts and graces that St. Joseph could never possess . . . He longed, not to possess or grasp for what they had, but to be a gift to them and humbly receive what they desired to give him -- their love. . . 

To love others with this kind of disinterested love means to first receive the love that God has for us. . . When we are missing this foundation, we will constantly be looking at the gifts of others as things that could give us value instead. 

From Consecration to Jesus through Saint Joseph:

An Integrated Look at the Holy Family

(pp. 40-41)

Bottaro and Settle

Do you long for things that others possess?

Yes, especially a stable family life. 

Do you compare yourself to others?

Yes, whether it's advancement in their vocations or markers of worldly success or adulthood that I lack, I do compare myself to others. I wonder what my life would be like if I had the parental love I needed or certain physical gifts or an earlier emotional maturity that comes from security in love. 

Do you wish that others didn't have the gifts and spiritual graces they do?

Sometimes, they less frequently. For example, I sometimes feel a pang of jealousy when I see engagement announcements or couples' vacation photos or the birth of children. Or I see others professional advances and experience momentary envy. 

I'm better able to happily appreciate the spiritual graces that others receive. 

Are you sad or joyful when a friend receives something you wish you had?

I'm usually joyful. I like to celebrate with friends and recognize and affirm their success and talent. 

Are you willing to suffer for the good of the other?

Yes, but I have to catch myself when I am stressed or tired. My generosity and attention for others can plummet to zero in those situations. 

Are you at peace with what the Father has given you?

No. There's more work and prayer and humility before that can happen. I need to ponder and meditate and God's great love for me. The more I pray and graciously receive His love, the more I can be at peace. 

St. Joe's Consecration Day 9: Vice of Greed and Virtue of Generosity

Proverbs 11:24-25

One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; 

Another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want.

This is the language of greed -- love and selfish desire for the material things, while being blinded to the value of spiritual things. . . St. Joseph lived a life of generosity . . . (He) freely chose to give his life to protect (Mary) and the Son of God. He lavished his love upon them. He protected Our Lady and the Son of God in such a hidden way that even his fellow villagers didn't know who Jesus was. 

St. Joseph knew that the treasure he possessed was the richest of all riches. 

. . . A heart disposed to greed closes itself off to others. 

. . . A generous heart, like the heart of St. Joseph, opens itself and gives everything it possesses. It empties itself for the good of the other. 

From Consecration to Jesus through Saint Joseph:

An Integrated Look at the Holy Family

(pp. 38-39)

Bottaro and Settle

Do you have a love of the things you possess or do you see all you have generously given to you by the Lord? 

I do still have a love of possessions and think too much about objects (e.g., new cell phones, new cars, clothes, etc.). I often forget that God is the source of all that I have. That my very life is a gift. 

Are you selfish about your time, your attention, your money, or sharing what you have?

Usually, no. Perhaps, if I harbor some grudge or resentment against a particular person or see them through the light of my own insecurity.  

How is your heart open to giving to others what the Lord has generously given to you? 

Donating my money to the Church or humanitarian causes. Spending time to join unfamiliar groups with a mission to heal divisions, welcome the marginalized, serve the suffering in my local Baltimore community. To make room for non-judgmental conversations with people facing struggles that are very different from my own. Reaching out to and staying in touch with friends and family, especially those who may be experiencing some kind of spiritual poverty. Teaching catechism, finding the courage to share Christ with others in conversation, especially non-believers.  

What are you holding back for yourself?

A hope or expectation that I'll have one day for myself all the markers of the "American dream" -- a nice car, a beautiful house, other creature comforts. 

St. Joe's Consecration Day 8: The Vice of Pride and the Virtue of Humility

 When Joseph awoke from the dream, he humbly set aside his will to obey the will of God. "Instead of defending himself and demanding his rights, Joseph opts for a solution that represents an enormous sacrifice for him." (Pope Francis, homily December 23, 2013). Unlike Lucifer, who was dominated by pride, Joseph made a free and humble choice to serve God. 

From Consecration to Jesus through Saint Joseph:

An Integrated Look at the Holy Family

(p. 36)

Bottaro and Settle

How does pride manifest in my life?

Whenever I feel the need to defend myself, hide my weaknesses, and point out the flaws in other people. Whenever I feel the desire to draw attention to myself or feel slighted if others don't pay attention to me. When I go out of my way to seek validation and affirmation, feeling entitled to it from other human beings, who like me are themselves weak and carrying their own crosses. 

Do I struggle to admit sin in the Sacrament of Confession?

Though I readily to Confession with a sense of hope and resolve, I sometimes find it hard to say plainly my sins without long pre-ambles of context that I use to somehow minimize my culpability. I long to hate more my sin and in a spirit of humility present them straightforwardly to Jesus. 

Practicing honesty with brothers in the faith has helped me be more humble in Confession. Admitting my sin openly and plainly helps take away the sin's power. That is the way to freedom.  

Do I envy others for gifts I don't possess? Do I seek affirmation for my own gifts?

Yes. It's easy to turn life into a series of checkboxes to mark off. For example, the fact that I'm single leads me to envy the people around me who are married and have the gift of a spouse. In doing so, I ignore and commit less seriously to the work God is doing in my soul to prepare me to be with Him. I confuse the means for the end. 

Yes, I do seek affirmation. And I've noticed how resentful I can sometimes be if I'm not affirmed. This leads to distance and barriers in my relationships. 

Am I willing to yield to the will of God for my own life? Or do I seek only my will?

I am willing to yield to the will of God for my life. I long desperately to know and do His will. I know that His plans for me are better than anything I could dream up. I pray that I grow to trust more in God every day.  

Can I share one of my poverties with the Lord today? 

Procrastination. Out of fear or anxiety, I know that I can fail to plan ahead and make steady progress on my work or different responsibilities that I have in my personal life. This ultimately leads to unnecessary stress, conflict, and lower quality outcomes for me. Sometimes I'm dishonest with myself and others about how my deficiencies and idleness have led to difficult circumstances.